Life sucks.
Obstacles get thrown our way, we have to deal with untimely death and constant injustice in our every day lives. We have to fight illnesses and fight to keep our friends. We have to work hard, usually for a shitty person, just to have shelter and food. We’re forced to work through countless emotions, analyzing them, deciding how we’re going to act upon them, and storing them in our brains as memories that will show themselves upon our request, or whenever the hell they feel like it. We have to think about how our actions affect others and even how they affect our future actions. Are we supposed to have fucking ESP or something?
Anyhow, the point of it is: life is shitty. And extremely hard to deal with on our own. Some people can do it. Most can’t. The human being was designed to be intimate. We need the closeness of other human beings. We need to feel a bond, a connection, like someone else in this world can ACTUALLY understand what we’re going through. We need to feel beautiful, loved, appreciated. We need to feel like we belong. But the truth is, not everybody will find where they belong in life. Some people will go through their whole life feeling out of place, unloved, alone, ugly.
But even if you don’t feel that way, it is so important to be loved. If you aren’t a socialite or if you’re like the Katy Perry of Casselberry; everyone needs to feel important, that they have a purpose, and that someone out there sees that purpose in their eyes, and falls madly for it. Like that endorphin rush after you do something great, and you just wish that “high” would never end. I think it’s important that everyone feels like they’re that “high” for someone else, and they just can’t get enough.
But the trick is, you can’t control how you make someone else feel. We can barely control how we make ourselves feel! You can’t guarantee finding that someone by going out every night, and you can’t just decide who you fall in love with. It is completely up to the Universe. But I’ll let you in on a secret: it all works a whole lot better if you don’t look for it. If you don’t focus on love, then you focus on yourself. And what happens when you focus on yourself? You gain confidence and knowledge and all sorts of other really good shit. Which in turn, makes you beautiful. Because who can’t help but be attracted to someone who is happy or, at least, appears happy?
I know it’s hard to not think about the big, empty bed you sleep in by yourself at night. and that loveseat in your living room that reaffirms that the only love connection you have is with your dog, and God, of course, the horrible amount of oh so freaking happy couples you see on a daily basis; but focus on you. Focus on getting that beach body for summer, or that term paper you should’ve started writing at the BEGINNING of the semester, or even just sleeping in, because you deserve it, dammit. Just keep yourself looking in the other direction, and you’ll be very amazed who you bump into.